Sometimes I think we all get caught up int he excitement of all that is at our fingertips. We all have smartphones now, so instantly we can share with family and friends all those awesome moments of our children being ridiculously cute, of our pets acting silly, our husbands being thoughtful, or plate of dinner. I'm not here to point fingers, if that were the case I'd be pointing at myself! I do think, though, that sometimes we are so eager to share the moment that we forget to live it. Instead of letting a wash of emotion run over me as I watch my daughter take my youngest son by the hand and walk him to the playground, I feel an overwhelming urge to share this picture perfect moment via Instagram. RIGHT THAT MINUTE. What is wrong with me! I can still great that great shot. And I can still share it. But I can live in the moment first, and enjoy it.
Right now I am in week five of a 7 week boot camp aimed at learning to live a healthier lifestyle, as well as losing weight. Due to some of the duties associated with the campaign, I've had to give up some of my "spare" time. Anyone who knows me, and knows I have 5 children (9, 8, 6, 4, and almost 3) knows that the word "spare" is used very loosely. In fact it's really more of a joke! Ha, spare time, what is that? I digress. My point is, I had to rearrange some of how I do things each day. And while I have felt as though I am busier than normal, I have still been able to perform my normal duties as mom and wife extraordinaire. One thing I did notice though, with the added pressure, I find myself soaking in each moment a little bit more, appreciating it more.
Today, Gray was up before the sun. By the time ten o'clock had rolled around he was trying hard to stay awake and losing the battle. I laid him in bed and kissed him goodnight, wishing him a good nap. But within minutes he was crying out for me. This is not normal Gray behavior. He's always been a very willing napper. Today was likely a case of being overtired and fighting it. After nearly an hour of him continuing to fuss and request I cover him with a blanket, find his toy, give him a sip of water etc etc etc..I finally just laid my head on his pillow and rested beside him. He reached immediately for my hair (he's obsessed with it), and soothed himself to sleep within minutes. Of course the minute I could hear that change in breathing, assuring me he was out, I felt the urge to hop up and get back to my housework. I stopped myself instead, I continued to lay there, for just a few minutes more. How long will I have moments like this? A sweet child unable to relax and give in to sleep without the comfort of mommy nearby. It's already a very rare thing in this house as it is. I lay there listening to the rhythm of his breaths and feeling the weight of his small hand on my ponytail. For just a bit today, I lived in that moment, letting it leave a permanent impression on my memory of my youngest baby.